The Butterfly Effect

All of my life I've been fascinated with butterflies. The elementary school I went to had a huge open area of just green grass and wild flowers. My friends and I would go out there and try and catch the Monarchs that would fly around during springtime and try to find caterpillars so we could watch the transformation. Most of the them didn't survive in the classroom. Our teacher would always keep butterfly nets and little "bug boxes" for us so we could go on our little adventure everyday at recess. It wasn't till later in life, I learned why I was so fascinated by butterflies. I related to them. I know that sounds weird, relating to a bug.

I'm sure you've all been read the book "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" Well, this is my interpretation of that book, except with a little twist.

When we're young children we love to play outside and get dirty. We eat almost all the time and want juice every thirty minutes. Or at least that's how I was. We are limited on what can see and what we can do. There's a huge world out there that we don't even know about. The farthest we've explored on our own is to the fence in the backyard or to the stop sign at the end of the street. We are limited, just like the caterpillar who spends most of his life next to the same tree he was hatched in.

Now there comes a time in our lives where we want to eat every ten minutes. We're growing, getting bigger and the world doesn't look so big anymore. We may have wondered a little further than that stop sign down the street. We get braver and kind of start rebelling. I like to compare this to the fat caterpillar. Eating all the time and getting cranky from carrying all this food around. He gets tired and starts to make a cocoon.

We get into high school and kind of feel trapped by our parents but at the same time, discovering who we are as a person. We start to express our true colors to the world. We're changing, slowly but surely we're growing and changing. Some for the better and some for the worse. None the less we are still in our cocoon.

This is my favorite part. Being set free. I like to think of this in two ways. We're set free to explore this whole new world that we did not know existed when we were little kids playing in the backyard. Our colors are finally more vibrant than before and we can spread our wings and fly to wherever we want to go! The coolest thing is, every butterfly in the world, no two are exactly the same in wing pattern. Same with us, we are all different. The butterfly also symbolizes a new creation. New creation in Christ to be exact.

I don't know if you completely followed me through this whole explaining of why the butterfly is so important to me and why I connect with it so much. I don't blame you if don't get it, or think it's "stupid". These words do not do justice to what I feel inside about the butterfly and how it connects with me. At least you know a little bit about how I see life now. But just remember, you are beautiful no matter what your colors are. So spread those wings you've been waiting so long to show off!

Who Am I, Really?

                Who here is a Christian? Good! I’m glad you believe you are. You believe that Jesus is Christ, the son of the living God and redeemer of your sins. Amen! There’s much more to it than that my sisters. We have been called to do amazing things in our life and in the lives of others around us. Now, you’re probably thinking, “That’s for other Christians, not me.” Oh but it is for you. You are amazing and loved. Let me repeat that for you. You are amazing and loved. Beyond anything that is worldly, you are worth more than gold itself. I wish someone would’ve of taught me that when I was growing up. Looking back, I’m glad they didn’t. You are meant to walk on your own path. People may walk beside you on the same path for a short time then return to their own. That doesn’t mean your path is not good. We are walking forward thinking “What is going on? I don’t understand.” That’s because you can’t see the finish. Only God can. So trust in Him, believe that everything will be okay. Look behind you, your past, some areas you’re still unsure why that happened but most of your past makes perfect sense. It’s like a big puzzle that you don’t have the picture to refer to. You’re wondering what is the big picture going to be? Then, you can’t find the puzzle piece. Where is that piece that I need?

I’ve been a “Christian” all my life. Attended King Solomon Christian Camp from day camp all the way to the summer after I graduated high school. Every summer I looked forward to seeing my friends from camp. Being surrounded by other kids my age who wanted to learn about Christ and develop a more in depth relationship with him made me feel, well, amazing. I felt wanted, loved, cherished. Not only from my friends but from the adults and counselors there also. Every summer, I was a Christian.

                The school year was a different lifestyle. Of course, I would attend church and youth group and be all about Christ around my fellow brothers and sisters. And during those times I was completely happy! But then came the partying with school friends. The football games, cheerleading, skipping classes, trying new things with all different types of boys. None of that stuff was as fulfilling as the time I spent with my Christian friends. It was a temporary high, an “I’m accepted for now” kind of love. Even in those times when I was “adventuring” I felt out of place, judged, alone.

                It's easy to forget who we are. Sometimes this world grabs us and eats us up and spits us out, leaving us feeling worthless. But we're not! We are God's children. We are never alone, or out of place. Sure the world tells us to be that girl, date that guy, wear your hair this way, wear these clothes... But why would do we want to conform to the ways of the world when we are so much more than that? God reminds me everyday that I am loved, cherished and accepted. One of my favorite verses is Matthew 6:25-27. Mostly cause I'm a worry wart but also because it assures me that everything will be okay no matter how the world or life treats us.

Matthew 6:25-34

²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Heart-to-Heart

Fear and Doubt

Let me just start off by saying this blog is not going to be your average blog. This is going to be deep. For those of you who dare to read this blog on a weekly basis or more, you will see you are not alone in this thing we call "life". You are going to read about faith, love, forgiveness, and all the feelings and emotions that come along with it. This blog is not going to be all about me though. I'm starting this blog to help you. So you can learn from me and I can learn from you.

This is going to be a "heart-to-heart" blog. Maybe even deeper than that! As I grow in my faith with the Lord and continue my relationship with him, I want the whole world to hear about it. I want to share with everyone that being strong in your faith is not an easy walk in the park, but is the most beautiful walk you will ever experience in this life.